Friday Funnies - Note: Can is also slang for toilet

from my days at Burlington Citadel:
Ok, so the youth group wants to have a fundraiser, and being the bright entrepeneur I decide to offer my cooking services. The plan is to have a spaghetti dinner, but I wasn't satisfied unless I could make the sauce from scratch. I sound fussy, but when you have a Hungarian Gramma living with you nothing gets served that involves removing a lid from a can. It would be a crime to eat Ragu or some other foreign matter in our house.

Anyway, I know how to make sauce from scratch, and that was the plan. Announcement time came in the service, right between the band selection and songster selection to allow for the exodus of the band into the songsters. I was given opportunity to invite people to the fundraiser and really make a splash in promoting it. My announcement went like this...

"Youth group....money...blah blah blah...Now here's the deal sealer. The sauce for the spaghetti is going to be made from fresh tomatoes, basil, garlic, and the sweat of my people. No cans will be opened in the making of this sauce. And trust me, once you eat my homemade spaghetti sauce, you'll never go to the can again."

It began with a titter and erupted into peels of laughter, and I just stood there looking confused, until I repeated what I had said a few times in my head. We had 150 at the dinner, and no one has ever forgotten Rick's Cure for a loose stool.
rZ